Monday, April 10, 2017

United Airlines Redefines "Bumping", Setting New Low Bar for Customer Service

Dear United Airlines,

Given your recent public relations and social media fiascos (see: Code, Dress; and Removal, Forcible), please consider the following three points:

1) ICYMI, smart phones are everywhere. People (including your dwindling customer base) use these devices to record audio and video, which they often share on this phenomenon called "social media." (You might have heard of Facebook? Twitter? YouTube?)

2) Passenger proximity predisposes patrons to complain about everything. Unless it's First Class or Business Class, customers are crammed into your planes like so many sardines in a can. Passenger comfort is directly proportional to passenger complaints: The more comfortable you can make your passengers, the less likely they are to complain.

3) The public doesn't want to hear your dress code rules or your "selection" procedures. Outrage has its own momentum; it's like an avalanche. Viral is as bad online as it is in confined spaces like planes. When your lawyers respond to public outrage, you've lost the battle for the publics' hearts and minds. And asses.

The good news is, you forcibly removed a passenger while the plane was on the ground and not in the air. The bad news is, everyone saw it. Good luck explaining this boneheaded move. #boycottunitedairlines #FlyAnyoneElse #BoycottUnited #Flight3411

- Sue'em! Sue'em all!
- Postjacking medals:
Bronze Medal: Mike Merriman
Silver Medal: Dean T. Carson, CPA
Gold Medal: Think Progress